‘Hold the Fort’ is a Blood-Soaked, Laugh-Filled Delight [Review]

Back in 2023, filmmaker William Bagley made his feature debut with the gonzo, utterly charming, and wildly entertaining horror-comedy The Murder Podcast. Packed with jokes, impressive practical FX, and an endearingly punk-rock, DIY spirit, the flick didn’t get nearly as much attention as it deserved. Now, Bagley returns with another lo-fi banger that’s similarly joke-heavy, puts the killer SFX front and center, and also showcases how far he’s come as both a writer and a director in three short years. Hold the Fort might be small but it’s mighty, making it abundantly clear Bagley is one of the most exciting and innovative filmmakers working in the indie horror space today.

As if any further proof were required, Hold the Fort reiterates that homeowners’ associations suck. The one in question charges residents a whopping $500 a month but, when you consider all the demon-slaying required, it makes a certain amount of sense. The movie kicks off with a thrilling cold open starring two ass-kicking elderlies (older people are so hot in horror right now, see: Laurie Strode and Allison Janney’s titular badass in the underrated Lou, among others). This couple has been tasked with defending a mysterious portal to hell for decades and, although they’re getting a bit too old for this s–t, neither party wants to give it up. When the patriarch perishes, a younger man moves in and is ominously told by his surviving spouse: “You’re gonna wanna take the trunk.”

This genial, mustachioed gentleman is Jerry (a fully committed Julian Smith), the new head of the local HOA, and the next time we see him, Jerry is rocking up to the front door of newcomers Lucas (Chris Mayers) and Jenny (Haley Leary). He excitedly informs them that the big equinox party is that night, slyly intoning “It’s to die for,” to which Jenny understandably exclaims “Why the f**k would you say it like that!?” in response. This is emblematic of the overarching tone of the film, which frequently veers into full-on farce but crucially never feels smug or self-referential. The joke hit rate is insanely high, and much like The Murder Podcast, Hold the Fort is clearly designed to be revisited over and over so you can catch all the funny lines you missed while you were laughing the first time around (honestly, this whole review could’ve just been direct quotes considering how many I wrote down).

Our first introduction to Lucas as a protagonist is him smiling like a loon while jogging around the neighborhood so evidently, he’s more open to making friends with the couple’s new neighbors. Jenny is understandably skeptical, but she soon loosens up upon trying some incredibly potent moonshine crafted by affable local Annettte (Michelle l Lamb). There’s no easing these newcomers into the proceedings, though. Jerry takes the stage and immediately starts laying out exactly what’s about to go down once the portal re-opens. And, when a flummoxed Lucas questions it, he’s told simply that it’s “pretty standard HOA stuff” that he should’ve read about in the contract he signed.

Did You Know? Wicked Horror TV Has Classic and Independent Horror Films to Stream for Free!

At just 75 minutes, Hold the Fort has no time to waste, so Bagley gets to the good stuff relatively quickly, making good use of his (super cool) single location in the process. Much of the action is confined to the HOA’s clubhouse, where the windows are manned by plucky residents ready to do their duty to protect the neighborhood. In keeping with Bagley’s previous feature, the characters in Hold the Fort aren’t strong, brave, or even especially vital – they’re just committed to the cause. Lucas, meanwhile, continues to be useless, including being repeatedly spattered with blood in a hilarious recurring visual gag. Likewise, there are two clever subversions of the overdone “drugs magically give you superpowers” trope that reiterate how out of their depth this lovable lot are.

Once the carnage kicks off proper – accompanied by a fun videogame-y score that changes with each new sequence – it really doesn’t stop, with a massive body count solidifying that anybody is fair game including our heroes. There’s terrific makeup, costuming, and practical FX on display throughout, with CGI only sparingly used, that we’re given the chance to appreciate thanks to tons of great close-ups (an arm popping through a stomach sticks out in particular, no pun intended). The portal itself looks great too, though it obviously benefits from being far away for the most part. A succession of recognizable classic monsters emerges from it, with Bagley showcasing some inventive variations including kamikaze bats and kung fu zombies. He saves the best for last, with a genuinely frightening, frozen Grim Reaper-style dude in flowing black robes with a melting face and pointy teeth. It’s a nightmarish creation, and, although still clearly nodding to other characters, another example of the creative team’s ingenuity.

The cinematography, by Alex Allgood (who also shot The Murder Podcast), is surprisingly rich, which elevates this beyond throwaway YouTube-style hijinks. Bagley demonstrates his prowess for crafting a great shot too, taking risks with the framing and showcasing a real evolution between his debut and sophomore features. He pays homage to his past with two key references to The Murder Podcast, most notably the hilarious refrain “magic can’t stop bullets!” Many of the same actors appear here too, doing equally funny, clever work regardless of how much screentime they get, which speaks, once again, to how this was clearly a group of like-minded weirdos coming together to make something special, all of whom were fully aware of exactly what they were making, and proud of to be part of it – that energy is infectious.

Smith is arguably the standout, due to the sheer level of physicality required for his role. But I’d happily watch any, or indeed all, of these actors take centerstage in future Bagley productions, especially with intentionally dumb names like McScruffy (someone mistakenly calls him “McShaft” at one point). Hopefully we get a glimpse at some of the other creatures that are likely listed in the How to kill vampires and other supernatural assholes book briefly glimpsed in one resident’s garden. On this basis, we’re only scratching the surface but then again, you can only stuff so much madness into 75 minutes, and Hold the Fort makes every second count.

WICKED RATING: 9/10
Director(s): William Bagley
Writer(s): William Bagley
Stars: Chris Mayers, Julian Smith, Haley Leary, Levi Burdick
Release date: TBC
Language: English
Run Time: 75 minutes

Follow us on social media: Twitter and  Facebook